Mirrors and reflections
Some stones are better left unturned. They should never have caught her. Then they wouldn't have been forced to face the facts, to see who she really was. Question by question had been asked as to help her memory, but to remember was a process of both fear and amusement and something she preferred to keep to herself.
She had felt their frustration, breathed their hunger for information and licked up the bitter sweat taste of their defeat. Not a second of weakness, not a tear or a slip of tongue had she given them and the blood of her veins pounded with triumph. She was invincible.
Standing in the round shaped room of her memory she gazed at the mirrors moving all around her. Every now and then she could apprehend a flickering light emerging from some of them, tempting her to take a closer look at her reflection. But she never did since years of experience had taught her not to give in to its invitation. Every time she had tried to, it had always ended up in agony and, as years had gone by, she had learned to accept the fact that searching for a deeper understanding of your life was just a time wasting task. She gladly left that to those stupid enough to focus on their inner development rather then their immediate desire. To listen to her feelings was no longer an issue. She could live out of other things that gave her greater satisfaction, building her existence on her cravings. And she loved it.
The first person she had ever killed was a girl. Insisting that some good country air would improve her grades, the whole family had moved to a farm to live their life closer to nature. She did not protest. After all, there had been too many questions about her high strong behaviour at her last school, to many people looking sideways at her, whispering. They all considered her nuts, she already knew that, after she had set fire to her mathematic book in class. But why should she care. None of them were the least like her. She was special.
The girl's name had been Maria. She had considered it strange that someone so mean could have gotten hold of a holy name. But on the other hand you could argue that her parents probably hadn't known what their new born was to become. After all Maria had been very manipulative, right from the beginning. For some reason, Maria had always won their battles, always finding a way to twist things. At first she had coped with it the way you cope with a disturbing sister trying to break into your room, but Maria had never stopped. Somewhere down the line Maria had pressed a button and unleashed the power of action.
She had brought her to an abandoned barn down the road. It had smelled strongly of dung as she had dragged her lifeless body over the dirty floor. It had been a hard task deciding where to put the body. In the end she just dumped it in the middle of the room and left.
An uneasy disturbance, some flickering of the light and the memory faded and with that the excitement she had felt by the remembrance. There was something wet against her skin, like she was lying in a pool of water. The damp seemed to get in everywhere and she shivered trying to regain her warmth. There was a voice, a warm touch on her shoulder.
She had never realised that she had fell into lethargy. Opening her eyes slowly she gazed at the nurse. Light brown hair accompanied by dark blue eyes and a firm body under a white coat. The nurse smiled at her as she lent over her to adjust her pillows so that she could sit up. Crawling up, her gaze fell on her reflection in the mirror at the opposite wall. Maria starred back at her from within the glass just as she always did. She wasn’t dead. She never was. Always there…
Screaming out in horror she frenetically tried to erase the image of the staring Maria from her retina. There were hands all around her, calming hands that soon turned into aggressive claws trying to hold her down. She screamed again trying to escape the chaos that her cracking mind was creating. Trembling at the dark abyss of insanity she reached back from the darkness for a glimpse of some sense. But it was too late. She sank helplessly into the damp beneath her. And the world was dark once more.
